Jalal’s story
I’m from Morocco, and I lived there my entire life until I moved to the UK at the beginning of 2021 to get a higher degree and discover a new culture.
In one of my visits home, I had a huge confrontation with my family. I brought a lot of clothes and other items, knowing my family normally would not touch any of my stuff, like my phone. But this time, I was really surprised when my mum took the opportunity to go through my stuff when I wasn’t looking. Thinking back on it, I think she was very suspicious about my lifestyle in the UK. Every time we video called, I would keep it short and always say the same things, so she wanted to know more.
She found my letters and a picture of me and my ex. When I got back, she was holding all the things I was hiding, and we had a fight. I had to go back to my room for safety because it was getting really violent. Eventually my parents told me to leave, or my dad was going to kill me.
He left the house to cool off, drive in the car. My mum told me “Once he’s back, you’ll have to leave or he’s going to kill you”.
So that’s what I did. I took my passport, my luggage and anything that I could grab. I went to stay in the cheapest hotel, waiting for the cheapest flight ticket [back to London]. Eventually, I took the flight. I needed three days before I applied for asylum to just process everything. I was so tired from the flight.
The process of applying for asylum was really difficult at first, especially getting a hold of the helpline for asylum seekers, Migrant Help. I understand that they have a high call demand and a lot of people calling at the same time, but it was very difficult to get through to someone and being on hold was very stressful, especially when you don’t have anything left on your bank account and you need a place to stay. The first week, I was just trying to find a place to live, and eventually they placed me in a hotel. I was there for five months until I got my call for my substantive interview.
“I found it weird having to prove that I’m gay. I felt like I had to prove it more than I should have to, when you shouldn’t have to make it a big deal. I felt exposed.”
The hotel where I was staying, there aren’t enough words to describe the conditions. I was very grateful that we at least had a place to stay, but the food was really horrible, it was food that would expire on the same day, so you had to eat it right away. I was having problems after eating.
The asylum support we receive is only £9.95 a week, which would barely cover the transport for one day. I was lucky to have some friends who lent me a little bit [of money].
Back when I was in the little hotel in Morocco before escaping to London, I was just trying to get my thoughts and trying to find a way, I tried to learn about claiming asylum but not everything is provided online. You need to talk to organisations or people who know about the process. I found Rainbow Migration a couple of days after my screening interview and they gave me a lot of information about the asylum system, because everything was new to me, and answered any questions I had. The biggest help was connecting [me] with pro bono Linklaters lawyers who were able to take on my case.
If I hadn’t found Rainbow Migration, I don’t think I would have found a lawyer and I’m not sure that I would have been prepared for the asylum process. For example, I wasn’t aware that I could write a personal statement to send to the Home Office, explaining everything that has happened to me. I was very lucky to have competent lawyers.
During the asylum process, I had to provide evidence about everything, emails, pictures of me and my ex, Pride, attending LGBT groups from years ago.
I found it weird having to prove that I’m gay. I felt like I had to prove it more than I should have to, when you shouldn’t have to make it a big deal. I felt exposed, like I really need to give a lot of details about my personal life.
It was a weird process, but surprisingly quick for me– I did the interview on a Saturday, and they answered on Monday.
The main problem after being granted refugee status is finding a place to live. Finding a DSS-friendly [housing benefit] place is so, so hard. I was lucky to find a Moroccan community who spoke my main language, and I was able to get a place through them. It was luck.
Now, I’m studying a course in Civic Service. After, I plan to study cybersecurity, and I hope I can find a job in tech afterwards. I have a lot of hopes.
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