Vladimir’s story
My name is Vladimir, I am a gay man from Russia. It is so difficult to be an out gay man in Russia. There is so much discrimination against the LGBTQI+ community; this prejudice is supported and actively encouraged by the Russian government. LGBTQI+ people can face abuse every single day in Russia. Homophobia and transphobia are so engrained in society, that even walking down the street can be dangerous. The Russian government finds many ways to persecute LGBTQI+ people. They torture us! When LGBTQI + people are abused in public, the preparators get away with it and not prosecuted. It is so hard to be an out LGBTQI+ person in the eyes of the law. Any legal security we may have had has been continuously eroded over recent years. Now, we are not socially, culturally or legally accepted, supported or protected.
I was trying my best to be happy in Russia, and I had a successful career. But life for LGBTQI+ people in Russia started to get significantly more difficult in 2013, when Putin passed the “propaganda” law. At the time this was a new piece of homophobic and transphobic legislation which made it illegal to “distribute propaganda of non-traditional sexual relationships” to minors, meaning you could be heavily fined if you spoke favourably of LGBTQI+ people around children.
This law was updated in 2022, to include adults, effectively banning any kind of Pride event, or positive depiction of LGBTQI+ people in any public space in Russia. The legislation encouraged people to be actively homophobic, often violently. They knew they wouldn’t face any consequences.
“I was trying my best to be happy in Russia, and I had a successful career. But life for LGBTQI+ people in Russia started to get significantly more difficult in 2013, when Putin passed the “propaganda” law.”
Everything began to deteriorate even more when Russia invaded Ukraine in February 2022. The invasion was framed in lots of different ways. We were told it was justified for lots of reasons. It is presented to people in Russia as not only about Ukraine, but about Russia against the so-called satanic west. The government attempts to justify the war to citizens by claiming it’s to “protect and preserve” the country, family values, and traditional Russian culture. As many Russian people see being LGBTQI+ as being an imported “problem” from the West, and therefore “anti-Russian”, the war has only encouraged even more homophobia and transphobia.
It was just after the invasion that I came out as a gay man, on social media. I got a lot of hate online because I am against the invasion. Now that I’d come out, I received even more violent threats. I knew I wasn’t safe and began to fear for my life, and soon after, I fled Russia.
I eventually came to the UK in April 2022. I had some savings and found somewhere to live in London, but by July I’d run out of funds and asked the Home Office for financial support. At the first hostel the Home Office sent me to I faced homophobia, so they moved me to safe accommodation outside London, for which I was so grateful.
I contacted Rainbow Migration when I first arrived in London. I spoke to Stuart, one of the Support Workers; he gave me emotional support on many occasions. It made me feel a lot less alone. I was always depressed, but it makes such a difference to have that kind of support, from people who genuinely want to help you.
I was granted refugee status in March 2023. I was so happy, and so relieved. I can be my true self here in the UK. I can live as a gay man, without fear, without the need to hide who I am. I didn’t know this would ever be possible for me. Until I came here, I didn’t know how to live without shame. Now, I can live openly and safely.
“I eventually came to the UK in April 2022. I contacted Rainbow Migration when I first arrived… I spoke to Stuart, one of the Support Workers; he gave me emotional support on many occasions. It made me feel a lot less alone… it makes such a difference to have that kind of support, from people who genuinely want to help you.“
I want Russia to become a free and democratic society. I want that so much. But for now, I’m happy to be here. I have the freedom to speak, to be anti-war, to say what I really think. It’s very important to me. We are all equal, regardless of our religion, ethnicity, gender, sexuality, politics, anything! We are all human beings. I believe in equality; it is the key to freedom and to us all living good lives.
I am truly grateful for all the support I’ve received. Without it I wouldn’t have had the opportunity to live as a proud gay man – something which should have been possible in my home country.
I really appreciate Rainbow Migration and everything they do. It’s wonderful that organisations like them exist. Their work helps people to be themselves. Many people come from countries where being LGBTQI+ is shameful and stressful. You even worry you will be killed. But after coming to the UK, I realised you can live as a gay man without any doubt, that people will support and encourage you, and even celebrate you. It’s amazing! Thank you for everything.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( None so far )Anel’s story
My name is Anel, I am a lesbian woman from Kazakhstan. My life in Kazakhstan was torture. I have short hair, and like wearing men’s clothes. People used to stare at me and call me names. It was very stressful to leave the house. It was always a challenge to protect myself and keep myself safe. Being LGBTQI+ is seen as a “foreign phase” in Kazakhstan. There is a quite big queer community now, but most people try and be as heteronormative as possible. It is much safer to conform to societal norms, and women are expected to be very feminine. Kazakh culture is reluctant to accept anything else, and generally people struggle to understand anyone who is different. I faced daily threats because people didn’t like the way I looked. It is difficult for anyone who is LGBTQI+, and if, like me, you don’t fit into gender stereotypes, life is very hard. You live in fear of everything, even your own family.
I came out to my mum in 2016; she said it was not normal, and that I would outgrow it. She took me to see a soothsayer; who predicted I would be married to a man for sure. My mother shared with me that she wants to send me to the USA to study but only if I marry a man and have two children by age 29. Most lesbians in Kazakhstan experience this kind of pressure and manipulation from their families.
I knew I wouldn’t be safe if I stayed in Kazakhstan. It was painful to accept that I couldn’t live my life as I wanted, that I couldn’t be myself. I was constantly stressed. I moved to China to study in 2018, and there I met my girlfriend. She is from Kyrgyzstan. I felt so much happier, but COVID meant we had to return to our home countries, and once the borders were closed, we had to look for somewhere else to be together.
“This country lets you be what you want to be, and people can accept this. It’s so much freer here… It’s so beautiful to me.”
Eventually we found an initiative to be a farmworker in the UK; we applied, we both got accepted, and we arrived in the country in May 2022. However, we were quickly separated again. I was placed on a farm in London, but my girlfriend was sent to work in Scotland. It was heartbreaking. My partner’s farm was awful; she had to endure terrible living conditions, and she wasn’t treated well. Thankfully she was eventually able to transfer to the farm I was working at. It was tough work, but we were so happy to finally be back together. We fell in love with each other all over again!
In July 2022 we went to London Pride. It was amazing. Everyone was so free; everyone was so happy! It was incredible to see so many people there together, as a community, being just what they want to be. People were smiling at us and telling us what a beautiful couple we are! It was unbelievable, and to be honest, even shocking to us. This country lets you be what you want to be, and people can accept this. I don’t feel I am going to be randomly attacked everyday just for being me. It’s so much freer here than where I am from. It’s so beautiful to me.
We applied for asylum in September 2022; in the process I heard from one guy about the possibility of claiming asylum as an LGBTQI+ person. He told me Micro Rainbow could help with accommodation, and then a close friend told me about Rainbow Migration. I got in touch, and they helped us, advising us on what we can do.
In November 2023 I needed to find a new lawyer and I got a call from Zehrah from the legal team at Rainbow Migration. She spoke to me for over 45 minutes and gave a lot of very helpful advice. She told me she will help me prepare for the asylum process and answered all my questions. She was so professional, very easy to talk to, and made me feel comfortable. I liked talking to her, and it made such a difference to have someone really listen to me and offer so much support.
I also spoke to Ayesha, the Legal Service Manager. She contacted me and gave me more information about pro bono lawyers. Then a few weeks later, one of the lawyers got in touch to say they had accepted my case. Zehrah came with me to the first meeting with the lawyer, in December 2023. I was so shocked – it was a very big law firm in central London. I was totally overwhelmed. I am so, so grateful to Rainbow Migration, because without their legal team, I would never have got access to such a big, international law firm. A whole team of four lawyers worked on my case. It was unbelievable, like some miracle happened!
I knew we needed to prepare quickly for the Home Office interviews, and Zehrah and Ayesha were always there for us throughout the process. They oversaw everything, knew exactly what was going on, and were always clear about what we should expect. They were amazing.
“I was granted refugee status in February. It was like a dream come true. It is so frustrating to seek asylum. You feel so alone. You can’t work, you can’t use your skills. You feel useless. You dream of getting status. Once you get it, your life can begin again.”
I had my second interview in January 2024 and was granted refugee status in February. It was like a dream come true. It is so frustrating to seek asylum. You feel so alone. You can’t work, you can’t use your skills. You feel useless. You dream of getting status. Once you get it, your life can begin again. You can’t make excuses anymore. It is such a happy moment, but you also feel a bit weird. I am still processing everything that has happened.
Now I can start thinking about my future. We want to get married and start a family. We want to travel, and maybe even open a business, or start a charity. We really want to help other people. We are hopeful, positive, and optimistic. We are looking forward to living safely and freely as a lesbian couple.
I am so glad we got help from Rainbow Migration. I am still shocked by how much they did for me; I didn’t expect it. I am so, so thankful for everything.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( None so far )Faisal AKA Etlala’s story
My name is Faisal AKA Etlala. I am non-binary and gay. I was born in Saudi Arabia, which is hell for LGBTQ+ people. I first came to the UK in 2019 and wanted to apply for asylum, but I didn’t know how. I was totally ignorant of the LGBTQI+ asylum process. I was in London and asked lots of people for help, but I was given bad advice. Sadly, I ended up in the hands of traffickers. I managed to get away and decided to go back to Saudi Arabia.
But life was very difficult for me in Saudi, and I came back to the UK in November 2022. I liked being in London. I felt so free in Soho! I didn’t want to have the same problems as my first time here, so I started looking for advice. I had to be persistent and insistent, because when you don’t know how the system works it can be so hard to get help or to know who you can trust. It feels like you have no-one to turn to. I did lots of research, and I realised I could claim asylum on the basis of my sexual orientation or gender identity.
“I was having lots of problems in the government hostels I was placed in… You have no freedom in these places, you feel so trapped, especially when you are LGBTQI+.”
I found out about Rainbow Migration and got in touch. I got referred to Ayesha, who told me how the asylum process works, and what I had to do. I finally felt like I was getting the right support. I was so relieved, especially when she put me in touch with a lawyer – she even came with me to visit them for the first time. I really appreciated it, I felt so much more comfortable with her there with me.
However, I was having lots of problems in the government hostels I was placed in. Often, I was around people who made me feel very unwelcome. They were so rude to me, calling me names and always threatening me, telling me I was a bad person. I was so uncomfortable; I didn’t feel safe at all. Normally I try and be as happy as possible, but in the hostels, I felt so sad and lifeless. You have no freedom in these places, you feel so trapped, especially when you are LGBTQI+.
Eventually the Home Office sent me to the Bibby Stockholm barge. It was hell; I felt so unsafe it was like being back in Saudi Arabia. At times like this, my experience in the UK has been just as difficult as my country of origin. Unfortunately, I have faced a lot of homophobia from other people seeking asylum. I was treated very badly on the Bibby Stockholm. At first, I had to share a room. Then after a few days I got to have my own room, which was better. I had some privacy, and good facilities. But everything else was awful. The staff were also so cruel, they treated all of us staying there very badly. They are always watching you, searching you, making you feel anxious. Once I went outside for some fresh air, and the staff made me take my jacket off. It was so cold, and I had nothing on underneath, and they laughed at me. The staff would say that people seeking asylum are only here on vacation. We were always being told to “go home”, they were always trying to get rid of us. It was horrible.
Someone took their own life while I was there. There were police and ambulances everywhere. It was chaotic, and very scary. No-one would tell us what was going on and the staff ignored me when I asked them. I spoke to Ayesha at Rainbow Migration, and she confirmed what was going on. It was awful, it was terrifying. I was so anxious all the time.
I was held on the Bibby Stockholm for two months. Afterwards I was sent to Manchester. Then I had two Home Office interviews. When I first came to the UK, they asked me lots of very invasive questions. It didn’t feel professional, but you must try to answer as best you can. I was very nervous to have another interview with them, but Ayesha and Rainbow Migration helped me through it.
“I was granted refugee status in March 2024. I cried when I found out.”
I was granted refugee status in March 2024. I cried when I found out. I was so shocked. I knew that lots of the people I’d met on the Bibby Stockholm had been refused and removed from the country, and I was expecting the same to happen to me. I was so relieved.
I am so happy to be able to stay in the UK. Yet life is still very challenging. It’s so hard to seek asylum – then it’s so hard to start your new life once you get granted refugee status. I can’t explain how difficult it is, especially when you are LGBTQI+.
Accommodation is still a challenge. Throughout the whole process I have been moved around to lots of places which aren’t safe. Since I have been granted status, I have been homeless on several occasions, with no options for safe accommodation at all. The council haven’t taken me seriously, and I am still looking for the right place to live. LGBTQI+ migrants need to be made to feel safer in Home Office accommodation! It is very difficult to go through asylum and live in these places as a non-binary person.
But I am happier and feel better in Manchester. I have a few friends who are supporting me, and it’s a good city to be queer. It’s an exciting place to be, and I am starting to build a life here. I am meeting people and making new friends. I am slowly beginning to feel more positive. I have started dreaming again. I would love to be a singer. Singing and performing is an escape, it makes me so happy, and being on stage really liberates me.
I am excited for my future – I didn’t think I ever would be again. I have Rainbow Migration and Willkie Farr & Gallagher to thank for that. Without them I wouldn’t have got refugee status. Ayesha was with me every step of the way. I want to say thank you so much.
This story was originally published at: https://www.rainbowmigration.org.uk/stories/faisal-aka-etlalas-story/
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( None so far )Jalal’s story
I’m from Morocco, and I lived there my entire life until I moved to the UK at the beginning of 2021 to get a higher degree and discover a new culture.
In one of my visits home, I had a huge confrontation with my family. I brought a lot of clothes and other items, knowing my family normally would not touch any of my stuff, like my phone. But this time, I was really surprised when my mum took the opportunity to go through my stuff when I wasn’t looking. Thinking back on it, I think she was very suspicious about my lifestyle in the UK. Every time we video called, I would keep it short and always say the same things, so she wanted to know more.
She found my letters and a picture of me and my ex. When I got back, she was holding all the things I was hiding, and we had a fight. I had to go back to my room for safety because it was getting really violent. Eventually my parents told me to leave, or my dad was going to kill me.
He left the house to cool off, drive in the car. My mum told me “Once he’s back, you’ll have to leave or he’s going to kill you”.
So that’s what I did. I took my passport, my luggage and anything that I could grab. I went to stay in the cheapest hotel, waiting for the cheapest flight ticket [back to London]. Eventually, I took the flight. I needed three days before I applied for asylum to just process everything. I was so tired from the flight.
The process of applying for asylum was really difficult at first, especially getting a hold of the helpline for asylum seekers, Migrant Help. I understand that they have a high call demand and a lot of people calling at the same time, but it was very difficult to get through to someone and being on hold was very stressful, especially when you don’t have anything left on your bank account and you need a place to stay. The first week, I was just trying to find a place to live, and eventually they placed me in a hotel. I was there for five months until I got my call for my substantive interview.
“I found it weird having to prove that I’m gay. I felt like I had to prove it more than I should have to, when you shouldn’t have to make it a big deal. I felt exposed.”
The hotel where I was staying, there aren’t enough words to describe the conditions. I was very grateful that we at least had a place to stay, but the food was really horrible, it was food that would expire on the same day, so you had to eat it right away. I was having problems after eating.
The asylum support we receive is only £9.95 a week, which would barely cover the transport for one day. I was lucky to have some friends who lent me a little bit [of money].
Back when I was in the little hotel in Morocco before escaping to London, I was just trying to get my thoughts and trying to find a way, I tried to learn about claiming asylum but not everything is provided online. You need to talk to organisations or people who know about the process. I found Rainbow Migration a couple of days after my screening interview and they gave me a lot of information about the asylum system, because everything was new to me, and answered any questions I had. The biggest help was connecting [me] with pro bono Linklaters lawyers who were able to take on my case.
If I hadn’t found Rainbow Migration, I don’t think I would have found a lawyer and I’m not sure that I would have been prepared for the asylum process. For example, I wasn’t aware that I could write a personal statement to send to the Home Office, explaining everything that has happened to me. I was very lucky to have competent lawyers.
During the asylum process, I had to provide evidence about everything, emails, pictures of me and my ex, Pride, attending LGBT groups from years ago.
I found it weird having to prove that I’m gay. I felt like I had to prove it more than I should have to, when you shouldn’t have to make it a big deal. I felt exposed, like I really need to give a lot of details about my personal life.
It was a weird process, but surprisingly quick for me– I did the interview on a Saturday, and they answered on Monday.
The main problem after being granted refugee status is finding a place to live. Finding a DSS-friendly [housing benefit] place is so, so hard. I was lucky to find a Moroccan community who spoke my main language, and I was able to get a place through them. It was luck.
Now, I’m studying a course in Civic Service. After, I plan to study cybersecurity, and I hope I can find a job in tech afterwards. I have a lot of hopes.
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